My Blog

Where do I fit in? Where is my 'home?' Why do I feel displaced so easily? Where are the people who are like me? Who 'get' me? Will I spend my entire life questioning where I belong? Why can't I be like other people and fit in easily? Why have I spent my entire life with a void I didn't understand until I experienced grief? Recognising this lifelong companion of sadness and loss doesn't make it any easier. Something was broken, torn apart and I don't know what it feels lik

One thing that puzzled me after losing Mum was why I didn't fall apart? I had expected to be an absolute mess when the grief hit and yet I wasn't. Sure, I cried and felt sad but the utter devastation I was expecting never happened. So why was this so?

The seed of doubt was planted and because of the way our minds work, mine began looking for confirmation that I was indeed 'less than'.

The first blog I ever wrote was called Mayhem. It was a description of the worst panic attack I have ever had.